So, yesterday I didn't blog. Did anyone even notice? I know that may not seem like such a big deal, but here's why it is to me.
I launched Brooding On on March 23, 2012. There are a few posts dated before that, but they are ones that originally appeared on our family blog The Beller Brood. And, in the almost 9 months since its inception, I've posted a new little blurb EVERYDAY --everyday, until yesterday, that is.
Confession: sometimes I set rules for myself. Am I alone here? For example, "I can't read that magazine that I'm really looking forward to until I first finish the book that I've been struggling to get through," or "Outside poop chores must be done on Mondays," or "I must run at least 3 times a week," or "I will blog everyday."
No one is holding me accountable for upholding these kind of rules. Why do they seem so unbreakable?
I remember when Girl 1 was in kindergarten, I couldn't wait for her to "pull her first card" for poor behavior or miss a word on her spelling test. It seemed that a blue ribbon/100% streak was just too much pressure. Who can maintain such perfection? It seemed to me that she'd be better off once she'd broken the streak and would no longer have that "perfection stress" hanging o'er her head.
I don't need to explain to you how stressful the holidays can be. Last week really wore me out. We bought and wrapped countless gifts, made 70+ Cocoa Santas (that'll be another post), hosted a party, made an out-of-town trip, and ran the kids all over creation for various activities besides all the stuff that a normal week holds for our family of 5. So, Sunday afternoon rolled around, John took the kids to run an errand, and I found myself crashing fast; I was exhausted, and I hadn't run in a few days and really wanted to (I know that may sound crazy, but it's true). But, I needed to blog. Why? Because I had something I really needed to write about? No, because I do it everyday. Religiously.
This time of year, always seems to refocus me on what's really important. Yes, there's Christmas and what that means for me and for my world. And the holiday means that we get to spend more time with family who are so important to us. But, there's also this. Today marks the 7-year anniversary of my mother-in-law's sudden death. Without dwelling on the details, I will say that losing John's Mom changed forever the course of our lives and brought many things into stunning, brilliant clarity. What's truly important took precedence over everything else. And, as I feel her absence during this time of year, I'm reminded that everyday is a gift.
All that to say, I didn't blog yesterday. And, today, it's okay. In fact, it's more than okay. I took a little nap, had a prayerful run, and spent time snuggling my kids during the time I would've otherwise been writing. I'd say I'm a much happier person today because I chose to do those things rather than blog.
So, new self-imposed rule: no blogging on Sundays. It'll be my day of writing rest. But, more importantly, I need to learn to lighten up on myself a bit and remember why I'm blogging in the first place. It makes me happy. Hopefully, sometimes it makes you happy, too. :)